Hi Anindya, is it true that if someone has cheated once, they will cheat again? I’m married to a woman who cheated in the past, and I forgave her. A few months ago, I found out she was texting another man in a flirty way. When I asked her about it, she said they were just friends. Will she cheat again? Can I trust her?
(Ray, 32 years old, entrepreneur)

Is it true that if someone has cheated once, they will cheat again?

 

Hello Ray, I believe that some people have the ability to change. The willingness to change is the first step, and it starts with being honest with themselves. This can lead a person to learn from their mistakes and become a loyal partner. But—and this is the hardest part—the person who cheated must truly want to change and put in the genuine effort to do so with real actions.

The willingness to change is the first step, and it starts with being honest with themselves.

 

This means letting go of old habits that led to cheating in the first place. It means not being secretive or lying. It also means channeling all their attention and affection into their relationship with their spouse. They need to accept that there will always be other people who are attractive and different, but they must be willing to manage and understand their own feelings and resist temptation. If they can’t, or are only willing to change half-heartedly or reluctantly, then there’s a high chance they may cheat again.

If they can’t, or are only willing to change half-heartedly or reluctantly, then there’s a high chance they may cheat again.

I hope you can find clarity in your situation and decide what is best for you moving forward. If you’re still struggling to find clarity with this issue, don’t let it escalate. Reach out to us and schedule an appointment with one of our psychologists.

 

 

If you’re still struggling to find clarity with this issue, don’t let it escalate. Reach out to us and schedule an appointment with one of our psychologists.